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<title>How Arthur became a clown by ArthurFlecksGirl</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24203914">How Arthur became a clown</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArthurFlecksGirl/pseuds/ArthurFlecksGirl'>ArthurFlecksGirl</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Joker (2019)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Childhood Memories, F/M, Mental Illness</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 15:20:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Underage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,454</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24203914</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArthurFlecksGirl/pseuds/ArthurFlecksGirl</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Headcanons about how Artie wanted to become a comedian/clown as a child.<br/>Him doing magic tricks in scool ect.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Arthur Fleck/You</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>How Arthur became a clown</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>*Arthur already wanted to become a comedian when he was a little boy. The first time he thought of becoming one, was when he saw Charlie Caplin doing magic tricks on tv. He was fascinated by the idea of making other people smile. He felt like it was his destiny. He liked the idea of people clapping their hands for him and smiling at him. He also thought it would be a good way to make his mother proud. Maybe she would hug him more often if he managed to make her proud. That was all he wished for. He wanted to be a light for others. The other kids always treated him like he was the opposite of light. The absence of it. And he never knew why. He just had to do something about it.</p><p>*Everytime Penny was watching Chaplin on the screen, little Artie would stand beside the monitor, trying to copy the movements and gestures of Charlie. He tried really hard to make it as perfect as possible. Because he planned to show it to the other kids in scool. He never talked to them and it would take a lot of courage to walk up to them and asked them for their attention. But it seemed to be the only change to show them that he could be their friend.</p><p>*Arthur didnt had any friends exept a little boy called Alex Day, so at least he could show it to him. Alex was the only one who didnt made fun of him in scool. But Arthur also started to notice that Alex wasnt talking as much to him lately as he used to.</p><p>*Artie practiced every day and learned the little dances Charlie used to make. Even though Penny and her boyfriend got very annoyed and angry with him, when he danced in front of the tv. So he was doing it in his corner of the room only.</p><p>*Arthu didnt had a room to himself. His "room" was a blanket and some pillows on  the floor. He didnt had any toys exept a plushy clown that he was given by an old lady at a flea market. </p><p>*Arthur was very excited to show his Caplin moves to Alex, but Alex wouldnt talk to him anymore. His parants told him he shouldnt be friends with this weird Arthur kid anymore. Alex cried when he was saying goodbye to Artie, but he didnt had a choice. He was too afraid his parants would get mad if they found out that he was still friends with him.</p><p>*From this day on Carni the plushy clown was Arties only friend in the world. He swore to himself that he would become a famous comedian, so he could make people laugh. "People like you if you make them laugh" he thought to himself. This would be a good way to make some new  friends.</p><p>*As soon as Arthur felt confident enough to show his Charlie Caplin moves to the other kids in scool he asked them to watch him. He felt very brave talking to his bullies. He never though he could do it. But he had a passion in his heart. He belived in his little dances. The music in his head helped him to escape the fear of being bullied again.</p><p>*The kids in scool acted annoyed when he came up to them. "Just do it" they said "So it will be over soon and we dont have to look at your stupid face forever".</p><p>*Arthur started . In his head he transformed to Charlie. He imagined to look like him, to wear his clothes. The moustache. He always had a great imagination. He did great but the other kids started laughing in less than a minute. But in the wrong way. They were laughing AT him and called him a freak. Artie ran away, out of the scool yard and cried behind the trash cans.</p><p>*He tought about this a lot and a few weeks later he thought of becoming an actual  clown.  Maybe it was better to create his own idendity rather than copy someone elses work. A real clown with make up,puffy hair, a big red nose. But most important. He had to learn magic tricks. And he needed stuff like a magic wand and cards.</p><p>*Arthur asked Penny if she could buy him some items, so he could learn how to become a clown. But she eighter wasnt listening or telling him that this a stupid idea and she didnt had any money to waste.</p><p>*He decited to make the cards all by himself, drawing different symbols on pieces of paper until he had enough to do the magic tricks he saw on tv. He also cafted a magic wand all by himself, by collection flowers. He glued them to an branch he found on the sidewalk. So it looked like the flowers were popping out of the wand. He didnt figured out how to do the tick yet but he was convinced that he will.</p><p>*Artie spent a lot of time alone in his corner, trying to figure out what tricks he could do with the few stuff he had. He collected little stones when he was outside and learned how to make it seem like they disappear in his hands. He always had to wait until Penny and her boyfriend were alspeep, so he could turn on the tv and search for some programm that would show magic tricks. There wasnt a lot but Artie tried to remember everything he get to see and he was really good at it.</p><p>*Arthur started to write his first diary at the time, so he could remember all the tricks he had learned by now. He made little drawings of the different steps and cards. And wrote down what he wanted to learn in the furure. He also thought of making up his own jokes. He wasnt sure if he wanted to be a clown that wasnt talking or if he wanted to talk to his audience. His idol Chaplin didnt talk. But on the other hand he really liked the idea of telling his own jokes to people.</p><p>*One day Arthur walked up to the other kids at the scool yard. They gave him a dirty look already, because usually he never walked towards them. They wouldnt even let him without calling him names. But this time he hoped that he could change their minds. Maybe they would listen and look for ONCE and maybe they would actually like his magic tricks.</p><p>* "I`ve got some magic for you" little Artie said. The other kids already whispering, giggeling.</p><p>"Alright. Show us your freak action then" one of the kids laughed and Arthur started doing his magic. He started out well but the kids called him names "Lets beat the shit out of this weirdo if he isnt funny enough".</p><p>*Arthurs hands started to shake, he was trying so hard not to cry but it was already to late. One of the bullies grabbed his magic wand and ripped it apart. The blossoms fell to the ground and Arthurs tears started to roll down his face.</p><p>*"What a freak. You`re not a magician. You`re not even a stupid clown!"  the taller kid said, making one step towards little Artie and spit him into his face. The other ones joined and beat him until he was lying on  the ground. Arthur fell into freeze mode, something he did at home,too, when Pennys boyfriend hit him. he just waited for it to be over. he knew he didnt had a change. His eyes focused on the flower blossoms all over the ground. They kicked him real hard, but his heart was aching even more than his tiney body.</p><p>*After they let him go he collected the remains of his broken wand and stumbled home.</p><p>*Artie lied down on his blanket and cried. Penny noticed and he hoped that she would come up and give him a tight hug. Bu all she said was "What is it again? I told you not to cry. You`re ugly when you cry, Happy!"</p><p>*He told his mum that the other kids beat him up again but all she said was "You shouldnt complain about being in scool. You should enjoy it. One day you have to work for a living". Arthur crawled up under his blanket. The hard floor hurt his bruised back "No I wont Ma" he whimpered "I`m gonna be a comedian". </p><p>*He pulled his plushy clown close to his chest and whispered some jokes into the clowns ears. He was the only friend that was left.</p>
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